Monsters (Prodigium Academy Book 1) by Katie May

#Review Monsters (Prodigium Academy Book 1) by Katie May

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As the daughter of Dracula, you would think I’d be born the perfect monster.

You couldn’t be more wrong.

As far as monsters go, I’m a screw up—if I’m not tripping over my own feet, I’m accidentally murdering someone (it’s a real issue, guys).

Left with no choice, Dad decides to send me to Prodigium—otherwise known as Monster Academy—to train me on how to be a better monster.

When bodies turn up on campus, I’m the prime suspect (not that I can blame them. I’ll be pretty suspicious too if bodies drained of blood show up right after Dracula’s daughter arrives).

With the help of my mortal-nemesis Vin, Van Helsing’s son

Frankie, Frankenstein’s son

Mason, Medusa’s son

And Jack (sometimes Hux), Dr. Jekyll’s son

I might have a chance of uncovering the truth.

If I’m not murdered first.

The struggles of being a vampire, am I right?

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This is a horror comedy reverse harem with some dark elements. After all, you can’t have a bunch of monsters without some darkness. This is book one of a series. the daughter of Dracula, you would think I’d be born the perfect monster.


#Preorder Total Lunar Eclipse by MJ Marstens

Total Lunar Eclipse (A Reverse Harem Fantasy Novel) (The Afflicted Zodiac Book 3) by MJ Marstens

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Venus the Genius is back! Her mission: To kill Moon or bust.

I’m your Venus. . .

I’m your fire. . .

Wait, fire?

That’s code for help!

Hold on, Trust Tree Sisters, I’m coming (and not in the sexy way).

Better yet, I’ll send Super Blue because I’m elbow deep in some sh*t.

Not actual sh*t, but close enough. . .

Because with each passing second, Lina (a.k.a petty see you next Tuesday cushion) accumulates more power.

And she’s not playing to win anymore. . .

She’s playing to kill. . . and not just me, but all my man-gods.

Funny how love sneaks up and tears your heart right of your chest, but I would die for these men.

And if I’m not careful, they might just die for me.

Now I’m in a race against time to reach my man-gods and break a curse before all hell breaks loose on Earth. . . and I lose them all.

I’m going to need help from every dimension. . . I might even need to call upon ol’ Blue again.

Trust Tree Sisters, take arms.

The time has come; we have a B-hole to catch.

Let’s just hope we get to her before the Total Lunar Eclipse.

Hilarious new series that will have you laughing out-loud. –Book Blurb Reviews

You should really read the book for Zahra alone. Her internal dialogue had me cracking up, similar to Emelle from the Heart Hassle series or Willa from Curse of the Gods. There’s also a wonderfully unique premise with the whole Zodiac star signs. -The Literary Invertebrate

The Lunar Eclipse is book three and the final book in the Afflicted Zodiac Series. (Virgo Rising- book one and Retrograde- book two)

WARNING: This novel is intended for readers 18+. There is explicit language, sexual scenes with multiple partners, dominant/submissive content, and threats made by men who are FIGHTING to remain gods. Please do not eat or drink anything while reading in case choking ensues from laughter. Please also empty your bladder and read alone to not disturb others/ appear psychotic when laughing uncontrollably.


MJ Marstens Interview

PNR Permanently #Free Books

Renee George

You’ve Got Tail (Peculiar Mysteries Book 1)

Sunny Haddock, an animal-loving vegetarian psychic, is stoked to leave California behind to start a new life in the Ozark town of Peculiar with her best friend Chavvah Trimmel. She ups the moving date when Chav goes missing and high tails it to the small town.When the gorgeous Babel Trimmel, Chav’s younger brother, (along with the sheriff, the mayor, and some other nice folk) suggests Sunny haul her U-haul and butt back out of town, she’s undeterred. Her psychic abilities might be out-of-whack, and blood makes her faint, but she’s not a quitter. Besides, she’s not about to go anywhere until she finds out what happened to Chavvah. But Sunny has more to deal with than unfriendly townsfolk…like disturbing killer visions and the dog-like animal no one else sees that seems to be stalking her every move. To make matters worse, she is finding Babel to be more irresistible than crack on a donut. Kidnapping, murder, romance, and a town full of people hiding the truth will keep Sunny Haddock busy as she tries to unravel the strange happenings in Peculiar, Missouri.Peculiar Mysteries series from USA Today bestselling author Renee George are laugh-out-loud, grip the edge of your seat, and swoon as you fall in love tales of mystery, humor, and romance that take place in the small Ozark shifter town of Peculiar, Missouri.

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Pit Perfect Murder (A Barkside of the Moon Cozy Mystery Book 1)

When cougar-shifter Lily Mason moves to Moonrise, Missouri, she wishes for only three things from the town and its human population. . . to find a job, to find a place to live, and to live as a human, not a therianthrope.Lily gets more than she bargains for when a rescue pit bull named Smooshie rescues her from an oncoming car, and it’s love at first sight. Thanks to Smooshie, Lily’s first two wishes are granted by Parker Knowles, the owner of the Pit Bull Rescue center, who offers her a job at the shelter and the room over his garage for rent.Lily’s new life as an integrator is threatened when Smooshie finds Katherine Kapersky, the local church choir leader and head of the town council, dead in the field behind the rescue center. Unfortunately, there are more suspects than mourners for the elderly town leader. Can Lily keep her less-than-human status under wraps? Or will the killer, who has pulled off a nearly Pit Perfect murder, expose her to keep Lily and her dog from digging up the truth?Fall in love with Lily Mason, the shifter who only wants to live as a human, and her pit bull Smooshie, a rescue dog who in the end may be the one doing the rescuing!Book 1 of the Barkside of the Moon Mysteries from USA Today bestselling paranormal cozy mystery author Renee George, is an exciting tale of mystery and suspense that will have you on the edge of your seat. A clean read full of humor and small town charm, mystery, and even a little romance.

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Gone With The Minion

(Madder Than Hell Book 1)

How do you save your family when they’re about to lose the literal farm? You make a deal with a demon, of course. And then you spend the next one hundred and forty-nine years making him sorry he forced you to sign in blood on the dotted line. To save her family, Southern Belle Olivia “Liv” Madder made a bargain with a demon lord and ever since, she’s been haunted…by her three dead sisters, and her own guilty conscience. Every decade, since the deal, Liv has had to find a human willing to bargain their soul with Moloch. If she fails, even once, he’ll not only drag her to Hell, but he’ll take her sisters, too. It doesn’t mean she can’t make Lord Jerkface miserable in the process by removing his lesser demons from the Earthly plane. When her latest contracted soul dies before the bargain is sealed, she has less than four days to find another soul or her own agreement will be broken. But Moloch offers her a get-out-of-Hell-free card: steal an old book once owned by paranormal researcher David Jensen. The same David Jensen she fell in love with sixty years ago but left to protect him and his family. Then Moloch drops the biggest bombshell: David has died.Heartbroken and feeling she has no choice, Liv makes the trip to Sanctum, Missouri only to find David’s grandson has the book. Worse, he’s keeping a mysterious family secret that threatens Moloch, Liv, and her three sisters. What’s a minion to do when her world falls apart? Get Madder than Hell and kick some demon butt.A Love Spells – Laugh Out Loud Paranormal Romance by USA Today Bestselling Author Renee George.

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Robyn Peterman

Fashionably Dead

(Hot Damned Series, Book 1)

Vampyres don’t exist. They absolutely do not exist.At least I didn’t think they did ‘til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead?Now I’m a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren’t bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I’m stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who’s teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator.To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions and my attraction to a hotter than Satan’s underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous . . . it’s possibly deadly. For real dead. Permanent death isn’t on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I’m his, it’s easier said than done. Like THAT’S not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I’m some sort of Chosen One.Holy Hell, if I’m in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.

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Switching Hour:

Magic and Mayhem Book One

Released from the magic pokey and paroled with limited power is enough to make any witch grumpy. However, if you throw in a recently resurrected cat, a lime-green Kia and a sexy egotistical werewolf, it’s enough to make a gal fly off the edge. Not to mention a mission…with no freaking directions. So here I sit in Asscrack, West Virginia trying to figure out how to complete my mysterious mission before All Hallows Eve when I’ll get turned into a mortal. The animals in the area are convinced I’m the Shifter Whisperer (whatever the hell that is) and the hotter-than- asphalt-in-August werewolf thinks I’m his mate. Now apparently I’m slated to save a bunch of hairy freaks of nature? If they think I’m the right witch for the job, they’ve swallowed some bad brew.

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Amazon, B&N, Apple, Kobo, Smashwords, Thalia

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Ready to Were:

Shift Happens Series Book One

I never planned on going back to Hung Island, Georgia. Ever.I was a top notch Were agent for the secret paranormal Council and happily living in Chicago where I had everything I needed – a gym membership, season tickets to the Cubs and Dwayne – my gay, Vampyre best friend. Going back now would mean facing the reason I’d left and I’d rather chew my own paw off than deal with Hank. Hank the Tank Wilson was the six foot three, obnoxious, egotistical, perfect-assed, best-sex-of-my-life, Werewolf who cheated on me and broke my heart. At the time, I did what any rational woman would do. I left in the middle of the night with a suitcase, big plans and enough money for a one-way bus ticket to freedom. I vowed to never return.But here I am, trying to wrap my head around what has happened to some missing Weres without wrapping my body around Hank. I hope I don’t have to eat my words and my paw.

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Angie Fox

Southern Spirits (Southern Ghost Hunter Mysteries Book 1)

One simple mistake…For a girl who is about to lose her family home,Releases the ghost of a long-dead gangster,And opens Verity Long’s eyes to a whole new world.When out of work graphic designer Verity Long accidentally traps a ghost on her property, she’s saddled with more than a supernatural sidekick—she gains the ability see spirits. It leads to an offer she can’t refuse from the town’s bad boy, the brother of her ex and the last man she should ever partner with.Ellis Wydell is in possession of a stunning historic property haunted by some of Sugarland Tennessee’s finest former citizens. Only some of them are growing restless—and destructive. He hires Verity to put an end to the disturbances. But soon, Verity learns there’s more to the mysterious estate than floating specters, secret passageways, and hidden rooms. There’s a modern day mystery afoot, one that hinges on a decades-old murder. Verity isn’t above questioning the living, or the dead. But can she discover the truth before the killer finds her?

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Kristen Painter

The Vampire’s Mail Order Bride (Nocturne Falls Book 1)

Welcome to Nocturne Falls, the town where Halloween is celebrated 365 days a year. The tourists think it’s all a show: the vampires, the werewolves, the witches, the occasional gargoyle flying through the sky. But the supernaturals populating the town know better. Living in Nocturne Falls means being yourself. Fangs, fur, and all.After seeing her maybe-mobster boss murder a guy, Delaney James assumes a new identity and pretends to be a mail order bride. She finds her groom-to-be living in a town that celebrates Halloween every day. Weird. But not as weird as what she doesn’t know. Her groom-to-be is a 400-year-old vampire.Hugh Ellingham has only agreed to the arranged set up to make his overbearing grandmother happy. In thirty days, whatever bridezilla shows up at his door will be escorted right back out. His past means love is no longer an option. Not if the woman’s going to have a future. Except he never counted on Delaney and falling in love for real.Too bad both of them are keeping some mighty big secrets…

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Amazon, B&N, Apple, Kobo, Smashwords, Thalia, 24S, Scribed

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Miss Frost Solves A Cold Case: A Nocturne Falls Mystery (Jayne Frost Book 1)

Welcome to Nocturne Falls, the town that celebrates Halloween 365 days a year.Jayne Frost is a lot of things. Winter elf, Jack Frost’s daughter, Santa Claus’s niece, heir to the Winter Throne and now…private investigator. Sort of.Needing someone he can trust, her father sends her undercover to Nocturne Falls to find out why employees at the Santa’s Workshop toy store are going missing.Doing that requires getting to know the town, which leads to interesting encounters with a sexy vampire, an old flame, and an elevator that’s strictly off-limits. The more Jayne finds out, the more questions she has, but the answers lead her deeper into danger.Will her magic save her? Or will she come up cold?

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Amazon, Apple, B&N, Kobo, Scribed, 24S, Thalia

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Author Robyn Peterman #interview

Please give a warm welcome to author Robyn Peterman

NYT and USA Today best selling author, Robyn Peterman writes because the people inside her head won’t leave her alone until she gives them life on paper. She writes snarky, sexy, funny paranormal and snarky, sexy, funny contemporaries.

Her addictions include laughing really hard with friends, shoes (the expensive kind), Target, Coke Zero Cherry with extra ice in a styrofoam cup, bejeweled reading glasses, her kids, her super-hot hubby and collecting stray animals.

A former professional actress, with Broadway, film and T.V. credits, she now lives in the south with her family and too many animals to count. Writing gives her peace and makes her whole, plus having a job where she can work in her underpants works really well for her.

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Have you always wanted to become an author?

I have always written. However, the first half of my grownup life I was a professional actress!

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What was your inspiration for your current book/series?

My life. My family. Overheard conversations and my warped imagination!

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What are you working on now?

A Fashionably Fiasco. Book 12 in theHot Damned Series. (Mother Nature’s Book)

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Do you have any quirks while writing?

I like to write outside. LOL

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What are your hopes for the future?

Happy and healthy family.

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Do you have any advice for new authors about the publishing world?

Write a good book and then write another and another etc. Great titles and covers are important. GET GOOD EDITING!!!

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Do you have anything to say to your readers?

I adore my readers. Thanks for playing in my sandbox!

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Free books

Ready To Were

Fashionably Dead

Switching Hour

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Sea Shenanigans Collection One

BLURB

Come for the vacation. Stay for the shenanigans!

Mermaids. Check.

Pirates, Selkies, and Demi-Gods.

Check. Check. Check.

Come on an adventure with my Mermaids and their unlikely heroes. Get 3 hilarious stories all in 1 big book!

The Sea Shenanigans Series has been a delight to write and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I loved writing it.

xoxo Robyn

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Book 1 – Tallulah’s Temptation

Running a tourist trap for humans in the Bermuda Triangle had sounded like a fine plan—until it wasn’t. With the Sea Hags gunning for our island, I did what any desperate Mermaid would do. I called for backup.

Unfortunately, they sent Pirate Doug, the scoundrel that pillaged our treasure along with my heart.

What in the Chicken of the Sea was I thinking?

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Book 2 – Ariel’s Antics

What in a clam shell does a Mermaid have to do to find true love?

Saving my island home is a must. However, the mission is to seek out the very Selkie who stole my heart, the same asshat whose Johnson I’d tried to truncate.

Ask any tuna you happen to see. Who’s the craziest Mermaid? That would be me.

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Book 3 – Misty’s Mayhem

What’s love got to do with it? If you’re Cupid, everything. If you’re me, not a thing in the sea.

I don’t believe in love. Poseidon is smoking some bad seaweed if he expects me to take the one job I’m obviously not qualified for… The God of Love.

Stay tuned because I’m about to give love a bad name.

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Book 4 – Madison’s Mess

What could possibly go wrong when a Mermaid and a Werewolf are sent on a dangerous mission by the drunken, diaper-wearing God of the Sea?

Better question. What could possibly go right?

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Author links

Twitter

Amazon

BookBub

Facebook

Instagram

Goodreads

Author Jacquelyn Faye #interview

Please give a warm welcome to author Jacquelyn Faye

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Tell us a bit about yourself

Not much to tell. Middle aged suburbian mom of two wonderful children and several pets 😀
I’ve been working in telecommunications for the past fifteen years, but have always been an avid reader. Stumbled across the reverse harem genre and fell in love. I’ve been working for Untold Press in my spare time, doing some editing and graphic work for my friends over there. One of them, challenged me to write a book…
I didn’t think it would completely engulf my life the way it has. I love the characters that came to life in my head and the Lovin’ the Coven series was born 🙂

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Have you always wanted to become an author?

No. I’ve always loved reading, but honestly I never considered being an author much. It almost felt too daunting of a task. Once you sit down to write though, and the story flows out of you, you realize you don’t have much choice in the matter!

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What was your inspiration for your current book/series?

Witches have always fascinated me. I think that ever since I was a little girl i kind of wanted to be one. Then I read my first reverse harem story and the possibilities kind of all came together. I came up with the title of the series and then sort of wrote the books around that, but I wanted it to be fun and exciting, so i stuffed it with as much humor as I could and let the characters write themselves

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What are you working on now?

Currently, I’m working on a new RH series called The Fox and the Hounds
It’s about a Kitsune who gets shipped off to an academy for magical folk to learn to blend in with humans more. There she meets her harem, but doesn’t get along with them at all in the beginning…
The first book, A Tail of Woah should be out sometime this month.

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Do you have any quirks while writing?

COFFEE AND LOUD MUSIC
Seriously, without those two things, i just can’t seem to get the words out. When i get home from work, I put on my headphones, start up the Keurig and just get lost in my own little world until it’s time to go to bed.

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What are your hopes for the future?

To be able to do this full time. I’d love to be able to make this my life. I’m just sorry I started so late!

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Do you have any advice for new authors about the publishing world?

Don’t dream about it, don’t think about it, just do it. Try to write every night, but if you can’t, don’t force it. Take some time to keep your head straight. If things around you are crazy, it WILL affect your writing.
Be careful who you trust, not everybody is your friend. Sad, but true. I’ve heard horror stories from many authors. I’ve been so damn lucky.
But the biggest piece of advice i can give you is, get to know your readers. Make friends with them on social media. They make it all worth while.

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Do you have anything to say to your readers?

If i could come through this screen and hug every damn one of you, I would. YOU, the readers, have made this whole crazy insane thing everything I ever dreamed it could be. Your reviews, your comments, your excitement over my stories…
I can’t thank all of you enough.
I LOVE YOU GUYS!

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Buy link

Lovin’ the Coven

A Tail of Woah

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Author links

Amazon

Facebook

Goodreads

Coven of the First Moon

Doris is on tour.

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I am excited today to have Doris on the blog with a spot of advice, to show you just what all the fuss is about and just who Doris is. Don’t be afraid, she doesn’t bite and it has been proven beyond scientific fact she has no teeth, but her wit is sharp and she does tend to rip into you if you stray away from being true to yourself.

With Valentine’s Day behind us and the lonely hearts club back to drinking wine from a box or perhaps, hitting the clubs again, there are still a lot of gals trying to figure out a way to keep their dignity intact and still find a man who excites them and will make them happy throughout their lives…or at least have a serious and stable relationship with! Maybe even those whose glitterific relationship has lost some of it’s shine needs a bit of a boost!

Are you game? We also will be having a live interview with the Cabin Goddess, Kriss (she is also one of the head Fairies here), and a central Facebook event page where you can post questions for Doris throughout the tour, get updates and links during the tour and ask more info on the novella! Everyone in the know has been itching to see this book get everywhere and in have people join them in reading it and laughing just as hard as they did! You won’t even need cream afterwards.. perhaps a glass of wine and a new boyfriend, but not any cream!

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Me: Dear Doris, what is your favourite hobby?

Doris: I love to relax on the couch and listen to the television. I prefer family dramas because I can’t see the television, so action movies aren’t really suitable. Something you humans don’t know is that the penises and vaginas of the characters on television talk too. They like to get in on the action and will say things to make fun of what’s going on upstairs, or they act too, making it even more exciting.

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My review

Talking vaginas, yes you heard me right. Now you might think this an X-rated book or extremely naughty, well it is a tiny bit naughty, but in no way X-rated.

It is about Jemma who is single and desperately trying to find the right one while dealing with friends and family, some of which you love and some you do not.

In between looking for prince charming in nightclubs, we get an inside view, or you might say a down under view of how life is for Jemma’s vagina named Doris and her vagina friends. I’m still trying to recover from laughing my butt of (I wish), the description of the troubles poor Doris goes through is absolutely hilarious.

This is a well-written story that you can’t stop reading once you have begun, so hurry up and get your copy.

A quote I love:
Doris was reminded of the movie Alien: in the space between a woman’s legs, no one can hear you scream…

Link to Rafflecopter: a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

Viva la Vadgeventures!

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Close Call: A Doris & Jemma Vadgeventure

Close-Call-3D-450Close Call is the first instalment of “A Doris & Jemma Vageventure” series.

Think Bridget Jones Diary and The Vagina Monologues.

Twenty-two-year-old Jemma can’t seem to get her life in order. Her track record with men stinks, she constantly worries about getting fat and ending up a spinster at thirty. And to top it off, she has to be a bridesmaid at her most-hated cousin’s wedding. She feels like her life is over, until Doris decides to help out. Who’s Doris? Doris is Jemma’s vagina and she thinks more of Jemma than her own brain does. Doris is on a mission to save Jemma from herself, but is the task too much for one vagina to handle?

TAGS: Fiction, Chick Lit, Humor, Women’s Lit, Romance

© 2013 Dionne Lister Cover by Sol Pandiella-McLeod

Now available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Smashwords, Kobo, iTunes, and Sony.

Meet Eloise March aka Eloise March

Dionne Lister - 2

Eloise March is a woman who laughs at her own jokes, swears way too much and breaks any new diet by lunchtime on the day she starts. She believes in women’s equality, and all equality for that matter, and hopes the things she writes touch people in a positive way, and make them think about how they can create a better society for themselves and others.

In her spare time, she enjoys living as her alter ego, Dionne Lister — a suspense and YA fantasy author who is way too embarrassed to talk about vaginas. She likes spending time as Dionne because Dionne has an awesome family, wonderful friends and a cat called Lily, oh, and she has great hair.

If you’re looking for Eloise, or any information about future books in the Doris & Jemma Vadgeventure series, you can visit Dionne’s website, where Eloise has been lucky enough to get her own page http://www.dionnelisterwriter.com. If you’re looking for a chat, you can find Ms. March on Twitter.

Facebook ~ Twitter ~ Website

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Follow the Tour

Monday – 3/3/2014:

Tuesday – 3/4/2014

Wednesday – 3/5/2014

Thursday – 3/6/2014

Friday – 3/7/2014

Saturday – 3/8/2014

Monday – 3/10/2014

Tuesday – 3/11/2014

Wednesday – 3/12/2014

Thursday – 3/13/2014

Final Day of the Tour – Saturday March 14th

Interview with The Cabin Goddess

Follow along on FACEBOOK